There’s been this endless challenge of defining what exactly it is that I do. I’m sure you’ve wondered. And even when I wrote about what my coach has done for me I still don’t feel like that was clear enough. I’ve changed my tagline like 3 times and I’m working a 4th iteration as we speak. Apparently this is common for entrepreneurs and luckily I’m no stranger to change, as I’ve written about over and over and over…
Then I realized- That’s it! I kept reading that I should help people with something I do well and what I’m known for are the pivotal moments in my life where I’ve completely altered my course. Even my previous 2 posts about quitting (see here and here) are just examples of how and when I pivot my life, often at lightning speed and impressive resolve.
My propensity for change started young. I remember campaigning in elementary school to get out of my private school so I could choose my own clothes. In 5th grade I moved to my community school, I got to wear what I wanted and had no friends. Then I went to an arts middle school outside of my neighborhood and a magnet high school even further, adjusting to new environments both times. I carried this fearlessness of going out on my own into my adulthood, going to college in North Carolina where I knew no one. After finishing college in Italy, I moved to Maryland with my sister for a job in agency PR. About a year in, I decided I didn’t like that career path, fell in love in 6 days and moved to Florida the next month for a man I barely knew. This is where I guess life was supposed to “settle down,” all that change was for kids but I was just getting started. After I realized that lofty mission statements don’t magically give me purpose, I made another career jump from a 1,200 employee local non-profit as a coordinator to a 100,000 employee Fortune 50 company with no connections as a manager, in search of a career I liked a lot. Four years later, I completely uprooted my perfect corporate life- sold my house, quit my job and started my own business for a life I love. Within all of these stories are some massive pivots as well, like selling my house in the ‘burbs to buy another house and ultimately reneging on that house and moving into a condo downtown. This constant state of change, of trying new things AKA pivoting to figure out my path is commonplace for me now, thankfully, because I feel like a Tasmanian devil as an entrepreneur but I know that changing is not easy for most people.
All of my experience from seriously altering the course of my life to moving up in my career, finding my true love, and running my own business, has taught me when to change, how to change and how to make lasting change. So I decided to call myself a Pivot Coach. I help people alter the course of their life, career, relationships and businesses in 90-intense-days. Pivoting happens in parts, it starts with a decision but it doesn’t stop there. I help you make that decision come to life.
First, it takes a lot of courage to admit that something needs to change, then you have to be resourceful and figure out how to do it then you actually have to commit to it and take action, all the while battling all of the habits, people and circumstances that get in your way. Over and over again I’ve fought victoriously through these steps.
1- Admitting something needs to change is scary AF. If you want to get healthy, that means you have to change your lifestyle- what about Taco Tuesdays? If you want to get out of that relationship- what if this is as good as it gets? If you’re bored at work- are you smart enough for that executive role? If you’re an entrepreneur and you just don’t know what you don’t know- what if you’re doing ALL the wrong things?! And on and on… But what about how amazing it would feel to confidently walk around in a bathing suit all day? What if you could have an amazing relationship like Sarah and Sean? What if you’re exactly what the company’s looking for in a COO? What if you’re right at your 6 figure business and you just need a little nudge? You’ll never know unless you make the change and find out. How would you feel a year from now if nothing has changed?
2- Figuring out how to pivot can be mind boggling. So you’ve admitted that something’s gotta give, now how in the world do you change it? Do you know someone who’s done this before? Can you Google it? Is there a book on this? A blogger to follow? Is there like a manual? Maybe. What comes first? The choice is yours. The possibilities are endless yet it’s hard to even know where to start. The truth is, the answers are there. One you figure out a course of action, it starts to feel possible and your dreams start to feel real. You realize that pit in your belly is excitement that the life you thought wasn’t possible, is.
3- Committing and taking action is more of a habit than an action. It’s going to be a constant swing between figuring it out and taking action over and over. Every pivot plan has multiple steps and each step requires commitment and action: 1- find a private place to break the news, 2- figure out WTF to say, 3- show up to said private place (3a- open the door, 3b- left foot, right foot, 3c- breathe), 4- show time, 5- go tell everyone else what you just did… Each action you take to change your circumstance breeds new actions to take… It’s easy to completely jump ship here so often, some steps are easier than others and you don’t know which steps will feel worse than others. And even though it may not feel easy, each step makes you stronger and lighter knowing you’re that much closer to your goals.
4- Battling all the habits, people and circumstances that come up is really a sub-step of every step. From the asshole in your head telling you that everything is fine, not to rock the boat, you’d screw it up anyway to the assholes IRL, your dwindling bank account, and the highlight reel on Instagram, there are seemingly endless blocks that will try and get in your way if you let them. I promise there are more forces working in your favor that will get you through if you focus your attention on them. Eventually you will create new habits, people and circumstances that move you forward instead of holding you back.
I find that people are waiting for something crazy to happen to them so they have an excuse to change, I say, be your own pivotal moment. Be your own life-changing event! Call me when you’re ready.